This I Believe

Shana - Oxnard, California
Entered on April 15, 2007
Age Group: 18 - 30
Themes: love

I believe in the greatest love of all. It might sound like a “Whitney Houston song,” but I do. I believe in love. I believe there will always be someone out there for me. My other half and guess what, I’ve found him. After searching for love in all the wrong places I found the other half of my heart, the other me. The one I looked at and said, “You look familiar. Do I know you from somewhere? Have we met before?”

I used to chase after love constantly. I would go after men who wanted nothing to do with me. I would let them steal my heart and trample over it. I was nothing and I felt like nothing but love kept me going. It kept me believing that I would find someone or let that someone find me. I would listen to so many love songs and put myself in those situations. My heart would race, my knees would get weak, and my eyes would be filled with tears. I would cry because the song felt so real too me. I remember watching a movie called A Walk to Remember. There is a song in there that is called, “Only Hope,” and always brought me into tears. I wanted to sing that song to my love, my someone, my other half. I always felt that if I sang those love songs, he would come. He would be able to hear me and come to me.

Sometimes I gave up. Sometimes I’d let obsession and lust come over me. I’d fall for someone who didn’t need or want my love but yet I was so blind to see it. I use to cry and pray at night. I would ask God, “Why can’t he love me? Why can’t it be me?” I had become so obsessed and passionate about this obsession that I gave up on love. But love didn’t give up on me. “They say if you love something, let it go. If it comes back, it’s yours and that’s how you know,” is a great line from Christina Aguilara’s song What A Girl Wants. I loved love so much that I knew I had to let it go and it came back with my other half.

I now live in happiness with love and my love. All those love songs began to apply to me now. I was the girl telling him to “walk me home.” I was the girl who was “saving all my love” for him. Almost 3 years have passed and I have stuck to my belief and planned to keep it that way. I have my soul mate, my other half, my key to unlock my heart and my diamond in the ruff and that’s all I need. All I need is love forever…and ever.