This I Believe

Katie - Berrien Springs, Michigan
Entered on January 23, 2007
Age Group: Under 18

Here’s two words to all the stinky people in the world, “Shower please!” I greatly believe in showering daily. Who really wants to be a walking wave of stink? I surely wouldn’t want to. And if you are, there are guides and reasons to being non-stinky. This I believe.

Guide one: Be smart my stinky fiends, there is on simple task that I highly recommend for you to complete daily. This simple task consists of one equation and three words: soap + water = shower. Is showering honestly that terrifying? I think not. It is not like water and soap are some form of acidic element. Your skin will not melt away if you shower, I promise! Trust me on this one, I take showers everyday, and my skin is still entact. So my smelly enemies, be courageous, solve this equation: soap + water = shower.

Guide two: Be smart my stinky fiends, take showers! Do you honestly want to be a walking fly trap? Big hint, flies like smelly objects! You are like a fly trap that attracts the flies and they stick to you like glue. That is until you take a shower. Would you enjoy being followed around by a herd of flies? I think not. Do you want to be huniliated by everyone that crosses your path? That is, if they survive after they cross your path of smelliness. Red flag, many people make fun of others who have terrible B.O. Well, my stinky enemies, to put it in harsh words, you are a walking wave of stink that shoots down everyone around you. You could actually be placed as somewhat of a dictator. You are torturing your fellow people! And this I would know, because when a fellow classmate of mine has bad B.O. I know that I can’t concentrate on my work. Another statement, you aren’t torturing others with guns, but with one of the largest and most dangerous weapons of mass destruction, the wave of stink.

Guide three: Be smart my stinky fiends, would you like to make friends? Well, I have a solution for you, don’t be smelly! No one enjoys being around a walking wave of stink. All they will be able to think about is how bad your B.O. is and how much you really need to take a shower and put on some deodorant. Again, the simple formula works every time: soap + water = shower, which is equivalent to the formula: x = friends. Take it from someone who has friends. They shower daily and put on deodorant. Do they have friends? yes. Do their friends stink? No.

Here’s to all of my smelly enemies. Use math daily! It is simple: soap + water = shower. This I believe.