I believe that we are all beautiful. Beauty is us in our elements, us doing what we are passionate for.
I think it was around five’ o’clock in the morning when I finally shoved my AP biology text to the side and closed my eyes to rest them for a minute or two. I scrunched my stinging eyes shut, pushing my thoughts about pyruvate and PEP Carboxylase to the back of my mind as I listened to the sprinklers in the backyard turn on for the third time that morning. I just tuned in to the persistent ticking of the clock and soft, never-ending buzz of the sprinkler.
I vaguely remember looking out my window and adoring the fuzzy glow every object had as the sun slowly crept up into its normal place in the sky. It crept like ink would as it bled onto the page, slowly crawling up and rippling outwards. Everything looked a bit blurry, a bit surreal, and tinged with the slightest purple hue. Beautiful.
Everything about that moment seemed so perfect, and I realized that my life was filled with these kinds of moments. I was so fatigued but I felt so alive—alive like when I’m rocking out with my garage band and getting blisters on my fingers from playing too hard, or like when I feel the strenuous aches of being out of breathe but still pass ahead of yet another runner during a three mile race.
Focusing my attention back to my textbook, a fleeting thought crossed my mind. With upcoming college application deadlines and semester grades coming around the bend, I wondered if I could uphold this belief and stay consistent to this core presence I believed that everyone had. I found myself wondering about my future. I was scared of what would happen once I truly became an adult in America, chained to capitalism and the never-ending mantra ‘time is money’. I was afraid that I wouldn’t be able to run through the fountains in downtown San Jose, or sit with my friends on the roof and trace pictures in the stars.
But I realized that that would never happen because I have Love. And the cool thing I figured out is that this Love changes your perception of what’s beautiful. In the future, inevitably, you’ll change, and you’ll love other things and people, and you’ll redefine what beauty is. So there’s nothing to be scared about, because with this Love, everything is perfect, like the sunrise on a purplish morning.
And well, that’s what beauty is to me—living, loving, and being ourselves. That’s why we exist, anyway, to do what we’re passionate for, and to do what we love.
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