This I Believe

Paula - Bangor, Michigan
Entered on January 15, 2007

This I believe

My life has been one great drama after another. I grew up with my mentally ill, drug addicted mother and sister to guide me. There were no postive role models in my life. Everything I am today, I learned on my own. And through all the hard times, I survived. This is what I learned. This is what I believe. This is what helps me put one foot in front of the other everyday. I believe my power comes from what I tell myself when I am all by myself. Words have the power to destroy or heal and for years I was destructive to myself. Now I know that everything I need to live the life I want is inside me, in my mind. My mind controls everything I see, think and feel and I am the only one who controls it. I am the creator of my life. And because I don’t have a family support system I can count on, I use the universe. Everything is made of molecules and is connected. I am supported by the trees blowing in the breeze, and the birds soaring in the sky. I imagine all the molecules moving and working together to give me what I need in life. I believe that everything in life has something I can learn from and use in life. Like learning what to hold on to and what to let go. Learning that anger comes from being hurt. And that I can only be strong after I have acknowledged my weaknesses. I believe in seeking out the good in people. You see, there is no such thing as on evil person, only human beings who have been hurt and don’t know how to express it or explain it. I believe love is about acceptance and although I may have the right to be angry sometimes, I NEVER have the right to be cruel. I believe I should think for myself and let others enjoy the right to do the same, because everyone has their own point of view. I believe whoever will gossip to you will gossip about you. I believe the best measure of success is contentment and that degrees of happiness are achieved through perspective. I believe I should talk less and listen more, especially to my children. It only takes a second to miss something so important it causes them pain and heartache for life. I believe in using controlled crying as a method of release. In my family, crying was a weakness, something to hide. Bottling it up is very unhealthy, so I create an environment guaranteed to make me cry for 5 or 10 minutes and then I go on with my life. I believe it’s possible Jesus was an alien. How would people back then know the difference between a spaceship or an angel? I’m still learning and trying to figure things out. Along the way my beliefs have changed and will be everchanging. Life is the lesson being taught, This I believe.