This I Believe

James - Stillwater, Oklahoma
Entered on December 11, 2006
Age Group: 18 - 30

This venture to find ourselves is a foundation in sand. As I brush my teeth and stumble

down the stairs reality sets in. The door opens and the chill of cold air reminds me of where I

am. It is winter here and my breathe guides me forward. It’s another walk to my eight thirty

class again. All I can think about is how much I want it to be over already. The university

education is not worth what it takes away.

My head phones are plugged in, and my MP3 phone plays my alarm clock’s role as

always. Hardly full speed, my feet walk the path they do every morning. As I walk by other

people coming to and from school the same absence lies in their eyes. Why are we here? What

compels us to this slow torture we pay for? The war in Vietnam is not the same as the war in

Iraq… So why do adults assume the university they went to still exists? This absence is cloaked

by the very thing we are plugged into. Without a degree what future is there? Choice is no

longer an option.

The first two years of “higher learning” are wasted on subjects that the

majority of students have already learned. Was post-modernism created to veil us from the truth.

Swallowed by debt and blood shot insomnia, knowledge becomes the knight in shining armor. I

wander if this grass I walk on dreams of what it would be like to just be able to grow… Life’s

lessons don’t come from a new anthology that cost fifty more dollars than it did the semester

before. They come from the interaction of people and action. They come from the relationship

between us and this outside world. I hear by dub this trail Zombie Path.

If all I can hear is the music from my phone, what interaction is there? There is no nod

of the head, nor the rare smile. It is just the same red eye flight. As I walk through the door I

barely squeeze through my meek desk. “Misappropriation of funds”… I smile to myself and

laugh. This elevator music is hypnotizing. No amount of energy drink can pierce it’s silence. I

have tried. Roll call starts and “here” comes from my throat yet again. The last place I am, is

here. The tragedy in all this is once I get my degree I just plug into a another socket….Is there a

purpose for campuses any longer? Well at least professor’s have they’re salaries right. I wish

the grass could just grow.