This I Believe

Lyndsay - Virginia Beach, Virginia
Entered on December 10, 2006

“Put Your Big Girl Panties On And Deal With It!”

When I was a little girl, my mother raised me to realize that there wasn’t any time for crying over a fall. I had to learn to get up and brush off my knees and carry on. She told me that I needed to be a “big” girl and deal with the falls as they came and learn not to be scared. This is how I learned to deal with life’s difficulties.

After years of many different falls, while standing in the Hallmark Store I saw a plaque that said, “Put your big girl panties on and deal with it.” This plaque was perfect! It went along with what my mother always taught me, to always get up after any fall. I have dealt with certain trials and tribulations or “falls” in my life by putting on my big girl panties and dealing with it.

My father left my family when I was eight years old. Yes, it was devastating for me because my father was my hero. But, there are children in today’s society who do not know their father because of a tragic accident. Realizing that my father never wanted a family helped me learn to put on my big girl panties and deal with the fact the he did not want to play a supporting role in my life. I am fortunate enough to have been able to look in my father’s eyes and know that I look like him—to know where I got my blue eyes and dimples. Some children are not that fortunate. What about the children who have lost their father in war or in the fight against a deadly disease? It seems too easy to fit into my big girl panties when I look at life in a different perspective.

I am twenty-seven years old. I was married at twenty-one and my husband abused me physically, mentally, emotionally, verbally, and any –ally that you could imagine. It took me a while to leave him; however, I learned the hard way that I had to put on my big girl panties and deal with a so-called failed marriage or lose my life. I left. I am not complaining or moaning or griping. I learned my lesson, and I cannot regret what I cannot take back. When people trip and fall, they have to learn to get back up again, to wipe off their knees and to carry on. However, I also know that other women might have it much worse than I did. Wives get abused to the point of death. Maybe looking at life in this perspective made it easier for me to put my big girl panties on.

I had three grandparents who died in a matter of three months—I was twenty-four years old. Yes, losing my grandparents was difficult, but again I put on my girl panties and dealt with it. How lucky was I that my grandparents got to know me? At twenty-four years old, I was basically the person I would become. Not many people get to know their grandparent. Many grandchildren are too young or too immature to want to hangout with “old” people. There I was going through my last grandparent’s death, writing his eulogy, and trying to get through a difficult divorce; however, I got my big girl panties on and I dealt with it. I dealt with the fall. I dealt with life.

So, when you are sitting there feeling sorry for yourself—try looking at life in a different perspective. I dare you to believe that you too can put your big girl panties on and deal with it!