This I Believe
The state or quality of being faithful to a person, idea, or custom; this is the definition of loyalty. This word may hold different meanings for different people, however it all boils down to the same thing. But who stays true to the real meaning at heart?
Many times during my adolescence I’ve experienced loyalty and the hurt of disloyalty. I’ve learned, however, that not everybody is perfect and they deserve a second chance. I’ve had one best friend since third grade. We’ve had our ups and downs but we’ve always stuck together and made it through all the hard times. We’re good together. It’s not until other factors come into the picture that loyalty is an issue. It’s inevitable during school years to make new friends, and my philosophy is “I’ll respect you and be loyal to you until you abuse our friendship.” During high school my best friend and I made new friends and had a group. The people in the group accounting as the other factors, and disloyalties.
If I heard someone in our group talking about my best friend I would tell her, and vice versa. Then one year, I had a boyfriend that I was with for 8 months. One of my “friends” betrayed me when I broke up with him. I told her that she was my friend before she was his friend, therefore her loyalty belonged to me. She told me she wouldn’t talk to my ex again.
“Loyalties flow deep between girlfriends until they want the same man.”-J.P. Donleavy. I find this quote to be true. Although I didn’t want my ex, a guy had come between my friend and I. She continued to talk to him behind my back. What’s worse is my best friend knew and so did a girl I considered to be my most loyal friend. I later found out my ex and my friend were dating, and no one denied knowing about it.
The pain from such a blow can cripple a person, make them feel alone and unworthy. After that things went downhill, but with the support from my family and my new loving boyfriend, I recovered. I learned that loyalty is either in a person or isn’t. Now that I don’t hang out with those people I see how blind I was.
I try to be loyal to everyone who’s loyal to me and to who I love. It’s not always easy and I may slip up every now and then, but being disloyal-untrue to duty, fickle, and lacking faithfulness-is not something I believe in.
If you enjoyed this essay, please consider making a tax-deductible contribution to This I Believe, Inc.