This I Believe

Miguel - Metairie, Louisiana
Entered on November 2, 2006
Age Group: 30 - 50
Themes: afterlife

This I believe

I believe that when a person dies he or she still has a second chance to find God in the afterlife. It’s a strong belief of mine, and I have been tested on it this past year. This is a type of belief that I don’t question; I have faith in it. Last year, my family experienced a great a loss. My little brother Hector Raul Chacon died.

I have had people close to me die before, but this particular loss made me ask, “Does life after death exist?” When I was young, I thought I was always going to take care of Hector. I loved my little brother, and his death took a little bit of my soul when I found out how he died. I wanted to remain strong in my belief, but I found myself questioning God and the afterlife with the senselessness of his death.

My brother died of an overdose. They found a mixture of drugs in his system; which consisted of alcohol, methadone, cocaine, and marijuana. My family learned of his death because of a rumor that spread around the neighborhood. A cousin caught wind of this rumor and began to investigate it for himself. He eventually spoke with one of my brother’s friends, Shawn. Shawn and my brother would always get together to drink alcohol and smoke marijuana. Shawn told my cousin he and a few other guys were parting with my brother. One of the guys had decided to go hang out at his grandfather house. His grandfather was not going to be home and they had the house to themselves. In the course of the evening my brother began foaming at the mouth and everyone panicked. They put him on a mattress in another room. A few hours went by and they checked on him; he was still alive. When everyone awoke in the morning, he was blue in the face.

I hate to think my brother died so everyone in the house could continue to use drugs. All they had to do, if they were scared of the police, was drop him off in front of a hospital. At least my brother would have had a chance of surviving. It was inhumane to let my brother die and do nothing for him.

It took me some time to realize it was not God or the afterlife that I questioned. I felt confused because I was angry that no one helped my brother in his time of need. I was also angry at my brother’s selfishness. This anger I had towards my brother made me feel guilty because I felt as if I didn’t love him. My brother’s life on earth was a difficult one, but I still have faith that my brother will be presented the opportunity to find God in the afterlife if he chooses to do so.