This I Believe

Michelle - Fairview, Texas
Entered on October 18, 2006
Age Group: 18 - 30

I believe in following one’s dreams. I am a twenty-three years old, recovering drug addict and a sophomore at Brookhaven Community College in Farmers Branch, Texas. My dreams in life are to become a radiologist, move to Colorado, and live on the side of a mountain, with five-ten acres and two horses.

At age seventeen, I was a straight “A”/” B” student at Allen High School. I met a boy and fell in love for the first time. I ended up pregnant, and I was forced to have an abortion in January of 2001. My “love” said that it was not his. My soul died that day, but my dreams endured. But two weeks to the day, I was in a horrible car accident that caused me to die literally three times on the scene. I spent three long weeks at the hospital, and then I went home in a wheelchair, still full and determined to make my dreams come true. I taught myself the second semester of my senior year at home. Also I learned how to walk again along with other physical therapy, and to cope with the pain of killing my child that I loved and wanted.

Needless to say, this is how my drug addiction started, trying to run away from the pain that was so unbearable. The drugs worked for awhile; I wanted to go to college, I felt like I loved myself, and the thoughts of suicide left, but that was only short-lived. The pain would come back, only harder, until I found a new drug to abuse. I continued on this rollercoaster until the law caught up with me for the second time, on March 26, 2005. I had the choice of having a felony on my record or getting into a drug court program called ”Divert.” If I finished this twelve to eighteen month program, the law would erase my felony off from record. Little did I know that my case worker Mr. Faust would help me change my life around if I wanted. I did, desperately. I just did not know how to cope after giving up on dreams for so long. I felt like I was dead inside. He helped me to see that everyone has pain, some more, some less; I just needed to forgive myself. No one is perfect; we all make mistakes, but how we deal with them is what matters.

Now a little after a year and a half later, because he believed in me, really listened to what I had been through, cared enough to be there anytime I needed help, and shared some of his story with me, I slowly trusted him enough to let him near my heart. Because of all that he did, I have my dreams back, my life back, and most of all, I have me! I believe in never giving up on yourself, if you do, it will not be long until everyone around, gives up on you too!