You never know what is going to happen next. One minute you’re here another you’re there. One minute she’s your best friend and the next she’s your enemy. One minute she’s with you the next she’s in heaven; which is something I experienced this past year (2005/2006).
In May we found out that our dear friend was diagnosed with pancreatic cancer. This was my mom’s best friend, my best friend’s mom, and my second mom. Our families were incredibly close and did so much together. At first I thought it was just an obstacle that she would overcome and didn’t realize it was extremely serious. First we always talked about after she was sick or when she was “fixed” but then we realized that time might not come. When Trixie, as I called her, started to get sicker and sicker we knew it was time to make the most of everyday.
I didn’t get to see her as much as I usually did, in fact I saw her less and less as she got worse and worse. Her son and daughter stayed home from school and ended up being with her the moment she died, along with my mom and their grandmother. I knew the moment I saw my dad in the pick-up line at school, that I would never get to see Trixie again. This was heart wrenching for many, many people; she had touched so many people’s lives.
It takes a long time to move on after the death of someone so close, and she stills comes up in our daily lives. You are never completely over it and that does shows through in these days after her death. We all wished we had spent more time together and with her, not only during her illness but before we even knew. By the time we wanted to begin living each day to the fullest, it was a bit too late.
Sometimes life comes at us so fast that we don’t know what to do and we regret they way we’ve done things in the past. That is why I say carpe diem. Don’t let life pass you by and make sure you live your life in a way that you can never regret anything. If you take each moment and make it worth something you will have a truly satisfying and fulfilling life.
Life is such a precious gift and so many people go through life in pain and suffering; they don’t ever realize what they are missing. As Tim McGraw says, “I became a friend a friend would like to have […] I took a good long hard look at what I’d do if I could do it all again […] I hope you get the chance to live like you were dying. Like tomorrow was a gift and you got eternity to think about what’d you do with it, what did you do with it, what did I do with it, what would I do with it.”
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