This I Believe

Cindy - Casper, Wyoming
Entered on September 4, 2006
Age Group: 30 - 50
Themes: question

For this I believe: Everything lives in nothing and nothing lives in everything.

The vibrations of life—music, art, science, poetry and religions are all about the great nothing running between everything. In the String Theory scientists think everything vibrates in the universe. I’ve given it some thought, and I think waves of sound live side by side with the great nothing. If sounds were always in motion scientists wouldn’t be able to hear the makings of the universe, and we wouldn’t be able to hear the individual sounds in an orchestra. The great nothing! Even on a microscopic level, scientists have concluded there’s a lot of nothing in the stuff of life. Outer space—inner space; we are the stars.

The canvas, the printed page, vibrations live between everything and nothing.

I also believe in the Chaos Theory mixed in with a little humor. Chaos lives in all five great world philosophies if one doesn’t believe me just ask a simple question and see where it leads. Religion in its simplest form is all about everything and nothing. The great everything and the great nothing we just call them by different names, life and death. Either from a western or an eastern philosophy most ask the big question: Does one get everything when he or she dies or does one get everything when he or she is alive?

The stuff of life! So when does one have the time to walk the river? From the desert to the mountaintop I see the importance in living simply so one sees God. I also believe a true believer doesn’t need stuff to validate God’s existence. “See what God gave me? I have…” After the list I’ve never been brave enough to ask, “To what or to whom are you validating your commitment? Do you just see him as the Great Stuff Giver? Or does one think God loves me more because I have more stuff?” From a scientific point of view stuff is largely nothing. And most of the world lives on next to nothing so is God largely nothing as well? The Stuff God is also the God who loves the poor. I’ll receive gold streets upon my death. Oh! Boy, the poor can get stuff too!

Control! At almost all venues where God is talked about: “Evil lives outside our doors.” It keeps the masses coming back: For no one wants to be evil and, no one wants to die with sin in one’s heart. Good books are thrown out the windowless houses of worship just to keep the masses coming back for more! And they thought Moses was lost in the desert… Talking about the desert on the map it isn’t that big! So why did his people wander for forty years or maybe forever? In my opinion the story is about nothing so one sees everything in God. Talking about controlling everything and nothing war hits the God radar screen. In war torn countries God is the one who keeps my butt alive. With every bullet and every passing day vibrations of God becomes stronger! “We are fighting for our country and our God.” Countries move their young to war out of a deeply rooted spiritual concept of God and patriotism. Moslem countries are better at war because they love their God more. They think, “We are the only ones who have it right! We pray five times daily.”

In our country we also have the tornado belt; it is also known as the Bible belt. The vibrations of God come in all forms. “We pray because…. He saved a wretch like me!” But who is worthy of being saved? I have evil thoughts. The ones who don’t go to my place of worship must be terribly evil because I know how evil I am and, I’m saved. I must kill them! Better yet, I’m not going to talk them!

The great nothing, banished from my friends. “I must fit in! I’m going to die without my friends.” Countries do the same things. “I’m not going to recognize you as a country until….” Who knows, they might corrupt my soul because I don’t know what I truly believe. So after years of thoughts on the subject, I like to believe everyone is right and everyone is wrong. Scientists call God: Q. unexplained energy source. It fits my need for a little chaos!

In my own life, it too is all about the great nothing running. I was born with a mild form of cerebral palsy, CP. I like to think of CP as chaos and unexplained energy. I don’t like the blame game in religious circles. Was it a sin? I don’t care! All I know is it made my movements jerky and at best my speech wasn’t much better. By the time I was a teen I functioned quite well. In my twenties I was struck down with I.T.P. blood, doctors, and terms. Too many platelets given and they gave me a small stroke! The stroke impaired my speech and it made my CP visible. My childhood came back. I cried for days. My words—the desert took them. A nurse gave me a pad to write down what I needed, but one little problem arose: I couldn’t read or write. I drew a book and put an X. on top of it. So with a lot of help that’s how I became a writer. Out of nothing I found everything.