When I was ten years old I thought I had everything figured out. My world was ordered, no ifs, ands or buts. My parents had raised me to go to school and do my best. Every Sunday we went to church and Sunday School and were taught to be attentive, if we didn’t understand other people wanted to pay attention. There was never any doubt in our neighborhood that if someone needed help my parentswould do anything they could to help. I was always included and given tasks that I could do so I would be included in the effort.
Our world was small,enjoyable and fitted in with the rest of the community. I was so convinced that this was the only right way to live that I never questioned our way of life until I turned 11.
This was the most explosive knowledge I thought I could be exposed to. In this year I graduated fron the primary grades in Sunday School to the elementary class. The very first story I heard was one of terror and conjecture about how my own parents viewed me. The story was of Abraham taking his only son to slaughter him. This was the first I heard of this God. Always before God had been loving,forgiving, and patient.
If Abraham could take Gods orders to kill his son, what were my parents willing to do to me?
So began my quest for a God that was all the things I had thought he was,and incorporated the “other God” who I was just being told of.
I am happy to say that I came to some conclusions that I believe and make my life a little more understandable.
I believe in a lovings God, but one that doesn’t hold back our punishment,usually in the form of contemplating how we have affected ourselves and the ones we have offended.
This is what I believe and I am a happy person with the conclusions I’ve come to so far. There is always time and desire to learn more and either strengthen or rethink our beliefs.