Sitting on a futon, drinking a malt beverage by myself. My “friends” in the connecting room discussing what is about to go on. I hear a sniff. Michael walks out and asks Liz if there is anything on his nose. He quickly cleans up the residue and asks if I’m ready to go. Disgusted at what had happened, I agree. We start walking to the apartment that he is illegally living in when he tells me “you should really try it.” More than disgusted at the act I am appalled at the question that I am being asked. I let it go and continue on the walk with him. We discussed family issues for practically the whole twenty minutes of our walk. Only to make small pauses while listening to the echoes we made in the silent buildings and glancing at how the light that hit the tree that marked the end of the block was beautiful. He switched his contacts back to glasses and we left his apartment and started the twenty-minute walk back to the dorm room. Something came over me and I had to leave him. I was not a part of that group, the odd man out. I believe that I discovered myself on this April night. Instead of walking me to my destination, he just asked me to call the others so that they could let him in. It was 3 a.m. I was alone in a deserted parking lot. I ran back as quickly as I could, paranoid that I would be abducted. I don’t talk to those people anymore really. Yet, I’d like to thank them. Awkward sounding, I know, but they helped me to see who I really am. Going away for school, I was a slightly molded lump of clay, now I’ve got grooves in me that are proving to be beautiful. Sooner or later, I will be a finished work of art on display for everyone.
If you enjoyed this essay, please consider making a tax-deductible contribution to This I Believe, Inc.