This I Believe

I used to believe that I could sing wonderfully. I sang when it rained, on glorious starry moonless nights. I sang when happy and extremely sad. Overall, singing made me feel better. So, when one day a friend told me candidly that my voice did not have much quality for singing, I was rather disappointed and discouraged.

In the following years, even though I listened to all kinds of beautiful music, I forgot my passion for singing. I reserved my singing practices for the showers. I became in all sense a bathroom-singer. Since I came to Virginia my sinuses were almost always affected by allergies. Finally, one day, in the shower, I realized that I not only have lost all sense of smell, but I cannot take a high pitch or go very low while I sang. It was settled for me- singing had to be left for another life.

Years after, as I held my infant daughter in my arms, trying to calm her down, a few words sprang from my lips. Magically, they made a rhyming song and moreover they seemed to have a soothing effect on her. So, I wrote down those words. I had rediscovered my singing talents and a lyricist hidden in me too. Then I had my son who, reasonably speaking, had to have his own little song. Still at times I was worried that my gravelly and out of tone singing might bother my children. The concurrent and recurrent occurrence, with my singing was that my children would stop and listen to the claptrap. Thus, I kept singing and making spontaneous with less meaning but enough assonance like quality.

So, one night when I picked up my 3-year old daughter’s favorite Dr. Seuss book. She pushed it aside and said, Mama sing my song. She actually preferred her song in my unmusical voice to Dr. Seuss. Wow! I thought to myself, my sweet doll must really loves me. My son is at the stage when he can articulate very little, but when it comes to showing preference he has made his liking for his own song clear, like his sister.

Since then I have overhauled my belief system a bit. I believe in my children. I believe in the confidence that comes with motherhood. I believe that there are many correct ways to be a good parent. I believe that children will accept whatever comes with love. Do I believe in my musical talents? From the creative point of view- may be not. From the love and power it exudes for my children- absolutely.