This I Believe

Jan. 23, 2006

This I Believe

I believe that in this mortal life we are afforded the wonderful opportunity of experiencing a few glimpses of heaven. I am not speaking of an actual visual glimpse of heaven although there have been many remarkable accounts of near-death experiences. Nor am I speaking of the visions of mystics, prophets or saints that are recorded in scripture. I am speaking of an experience that is more widespread and less supernatural than the accounts of either crash survivors or holy men. I am talking about intense moments of joy or enlightenment that seem to take us to the very outskirts of paradise. These moments feel both magical and yet deeply familiar as if our spirits sense that this happiness and meaning is what we were meant for.

I have been privileged to have a few of these glimpses in my life. The most recent occurred about a year and a half ago. Our oldest son was leaving for Italy where he planned to be a missionary for two years. We gathered in our living room on his last night at home and one by one each member of the family (with 7 children it took a while) talked about their love for this fine brother and son. I truly can’t remember what I or anyone else said that night but I can never forget how we all felt. Words are weak vessels to express those feelings but the love that flowed freely that night was unfeigned, pure and everlasting. Our departing son Shebby spoke last and his face seemed illuminated with a joyful, purposeful light. In sharing the experience later with my mother I told her it felt as though the edge of a curtain had been pulled back and the light of heaven had rushed in.

One of the most striking things about these small moments is how different they are from the day in day out struggles of life. We all know life is hard. As the daughter of holocaust survivors I know it can be excruciatingly hard and tragic. But even those who have been greatly blessed, face challenges. Some of our sources of greatest satisfaction are particularly challenging-parenthood, work and marriage come to mind. Many of the qualities we most admire seem to emerge in the process of persevering through these experiences; courage, commitment, fidelity, compassion all take root in this challenging soil. The contrast I have experienced between (heaven and earth) has led me to ponder why life is so hard and why I have had glimpses of such a different reality.

Of course I can’t begin to fully answer these questions but I know that on a daily basis my responses to the difficulties of life are making me better or worse than I was before. I need this life in order to grow but as funny as it sounds, I can’t shake the feeling that life isn’t what I was born for. Perhaps an analogy will help. We typically think of romance as merely the prelude to something much more important and worthwhile-marriage. But what if the reverse is actually true. What if marriage with all its commendable, hard-won virtues is merely the prelude to being truly, madly deeply in love- forever.

That is what I believe my glimpses of heaven are whispering to me. They are reminding me that, in C.S. Lewis’ words,)The serious business of heaven is joy)